


The Rosette Nebula

by galixr



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s02e13 Doomsday, F/M, Introspection, Post-Episode AU: s02e13 Doomsday, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-31
Updated: 2016-07-31
Packaged: 2018-07-28 10:57:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7637437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galixr/pseuds/galixr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the universe tears Rose and the Doctor apart, he seeks some peace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Rosette Nebula

**Author's Note:**

> Prompted by [puppydogtennant](http://puppydogtennant.tumblr.com/) on tumblr: Tenrose + Foreign Location
> 
> This also double dips with the timepetals weekly ficlet prompt: Doomsday

Donna had left, making the TARDIS completely empty for the first time since the Doctor last saw Rose. 

With stiff movements, set the TARDIS to drift through empty space. He tore his hands from the consul and turned on his heel. His head hung low, steps dragging on the grated floor in defeat. 

The Doctor entered in the TARDIS hallways. He briefly leaned against a coral strut, feeling his breath catch in his throat. Tears dammed behind his eyes and he swallowed in attempt to keep them at bay. 

He didn't consider himself as one to cry in emotional situations. The Doctor normally let his sadness develop into a white hot rage, but the loss of Rose Tyler felt completely and utterly empty. 

His throat seemed to close in on itself, chest heaving up and down in sharp jerks. Tears flowed in a steady stream. He choked out a sob and slid down the until he was sitting on the floor with his knees pulled to his chest. Twin hearts fluttered, sending quick pulses through his body. The Doctor could hear their cadence pounding in his ears. 

"A panic attack," he whispered to himself, burying his face in his hands. 

The problem was, he couldn't even fathom a life in the TARDIS with Rose Tyler. They'd only been properly "seeing each" other for a couple weeks. After an admission of love that long night on Krop Tror, they sank into each other. He let himself get completely lost in Rose until reality pulled her away. 

"Forever," he said aloud. 

The Doctor couldn't wrap his mind around it. Never again would he hear her giggle or make her tea in the morning cause he knew exactly how she liked it. He knew that from that day forward, every time he dropped two sugar cubes into his own cup he would think of how she preferred three. For the rest of his prolonged life expanse he would have to live with her memory, her ghosts. 

The Doctor forced a deep breath in and stood up. For a brief moment he thought his legs would break in half like sticks, but they kept him upright. He kept his body leaned against the wall, seeking solace in a room he'd never been too before. 

Rose told him a lot about the Anti-Gravity Room. She used to go in there after particularly rough days and just float through space as if she didn't have a care in the world. The Doctor needed that right then. He ached with every step and the desire to take the pressure off of his sore feet increased. 

The Doctor arrived at the door moments later. He thanked the stars for his beautiful telepathic ship. 

He pushed the door open and immediately felt the tug of weightlessness pull him off his feet. The door closed in, melting into the space surrounding it. 

The Doctor took a good glance around him and let out a gasp of wonder. The TARDIS made it seem as if he was floating through space, swirling colors and bright stars burning so close, yet just out of reach. He turned his body around and he felt as if all the air had been sucked from his lungs. 

In the scientific world, what lay on the south wall of the room was called the Rosette Nebula. It got its name from the sparkling, red light and gas that extended around an empty center, just like a rose. 

When the Doctor pictured Rose Tyler in his mind, he saw delicate pink flowers in a sunny field. The star nursery before him suddenly made a lot more sense. Rose was so very big and red, the color of both passion and rage. She brought life, just as a nebula turned gas and dust and rocks into bright shining clusters. 

And, by Rassilon, he didn't know how he was to live without her. 

That big moment of realization calmed to quiet melancholy as the Doctor let a sob rip up his throat. He could hear her melodies in his mind, still picture her unsmiling face before he left her for the last time. 

He tore his eyes from the nebula and curled himself into a tight ball with his knees to his chest. A low moan emitted from somewhere, deep within his chest, perhaps his soul if he'd allow himself to believe in such fanciful myths. An ache in his chest grew into a hollow hole, tugging at his the leftovers of his love and all the would-be's they never had. 

They never made love, never got to go on cheesy dates, never proposed to her, never gave her gifts to remember him by, never bonded with her, never this, never that. All those nevers only made the hole grow deeper. 

In his tight ball, the Doctor discovered that tears still flowed downwards in the Anti-Gravity Room and the floating sensation didn't relieve a single cell of his aching body. He left himself to drift and to ache and cry for hours, until the gentle pull of weightlessness lulled him to sleep. 

**Author's Note:**

> Any and all reads, kudos, or comments are much appreciated!


End file.
